I recently started reading “Getting Bi: Voices of Bisexuals Around the World”, edited by Robyn Ochs & Sarah E. Rowley. The book is a collection of hundreds of short essays, some only one paragraph long, written by people who identify as bisexual. Reading it has been pretty eye-opening for me, even though I already have a fluid view of my own sexuality.
The book has made me realize how rarely we have the opportunity to hear from people about things that we have a hard time relating too. It is the most extreme voices that find their way into politics or onto the news and the average person is pushed to the back, their voice never heard. I know for me it would be great to read more books that collect essays from people that I have a hard time relating too. That would allow for humans to explain why they feel, belief, act the way they do so that I could learn. Nuance and humanity is lost in today’s society… sadly. And it makes us all worse off.
I also think it would be pretty cool to collect essays from groups that I identify as. Maybe a book by drug users, veterans, poly couples, anarchists, or atheists could allow others to view people like me with a little more understanding and love. And I know that my love and patience would increase if I could understand conservatives, Christians, straight-edge, and even White supremacists. There is no harm in trying to understand why people believe what they do. In fact, I think understanding is necessary if we are going to seek truth and peace as a society.
Here are a few excerpts from “Getting Bi” that I highlighted:
“I call myself bisexual because I acknowledge in myself the potential to be attracted, romantically and/or sexually, to people of more than one sex, not necessarily at the same time, not neessarily in the same way, and not neccesarily to the same degree.” – Robyn Ochs
“Different though the sexes are, they intermix, In every human being a vacillation between the sexes takes place and often it is only the clothes that keep the male and female likeness, while underneath the sex is the very opposite of what is above.”
– Orlando, Virginia Woolf
“However, I truly believe that most humans’ sexual experiences lie not within exclusive hetero or homosexual boundaries, but somewhere in between. I hope that one day homophobia and heterosexism will dissappear.” – Mayra Santos-Febres
“Being bisexual is nothing other than being able to love, at least potentially, humanity as a whole.” – Miguel Obradors Campos
“It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for something you are not.” – Andre Gide
“Dad, you warned me of the hazards of ‘trying to find myself,’ especially in today’s society. You were right.” – Amber Terrell
“I call myself bisexual because I feel I have the capacity to love both sexes as much as members of a heterosexual couple love each other. It’s not ‘swinging both ways’ or ‘being promiscuous’; it’s about my capacity to love both sexes equally and fully.” – Simone Pantaleo
“But just because someone is bisexual doesn’t mean that they have loose sexual ethics. It doesn’t mean they’re a swinging cat. It just means you’re attracted to men and women.” – David Ertischek
“Bisexuality (whatever that means) for me is about the ability to relate to all people at a deep emotional level. It is an openness of the heart. It is the absence of limits, especially those that are defined by the other person’s sex. It is about not needing to choose. Who said that to love someone you have to renounce something? Bisexuality is the realization that you can indeed have it all. It is the power of not giving yourself limits.” – Andrea Toselli
“Some people say that their feelings were always there or they’ve known they were different since they were children. That’s not the case for me. I totally decided to be this way and now that I have had a chance to be with another woman, I realize that this is who I am.” – Talia Erinna